i have something to say.
oh yea.
what i am about to say.
does not make me a drama queen.
because it is the truth.

i burden people.
i give people troubles.
i don't deserve to live.
because it seems i just irritate people.
what is most is that i really really do burden people.
i am annoying.
and if you think im a gold digger. mostly cos i think of money most of the time when it comes to boys. isn't that shallow?
i wont deny it.
cos i myself think so too.
i will not point out excuses.
i am immature.
i give people wrong impressions.
i make people do things they dont want to which makes me bossy.
i am a bitch.
i won't deny that either.
because once i turn into one, they're too scared to point that out.
i made a guy no longer think of me as a girl but as a guy and treats me as one.
i would not point out his flaws.
for i have made most mistake here.
i burden people in ways that are COUNTLESS.
i irritate people alot.
i am fake.
i wont deny that either.
cos the things i do or say are fake sometimes.
maybe cos i lie alot.
i have a rude mouth and a loud one too.
the fact that people keep quiet instead of just saying it to my face.
OF COURSE ill dislike you a lil bit. but it will go away because of your honesty.

so here i shall make a conclusion. if you guys just be straight to the point, i would very much appreciate. and it would all make our lives more easier.
yes i am in depression and yes alot of frustration in my head.
these feelings wont leave me until some miracle happens.

p/s Yes, home isn't a very wonderful place right now.
pp/s I would very much appreciate if you say harsh words to open my eyes. it would make you a bitch but it helps me in more ways than one. and just think of it as a good thing.

YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE. WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?
SO FUCKING RUDE KAN?!
OH I BET YOU ARE FUCKING THANKFUL THAT NOBODY WAS THERE TO STOP YOU FROM HITTING ME WITH THE FUCKING BROOM.
HAH! DONT EVEN HAVE THE GUTS TO HIT ME WITH OTHER STUFF?
I AM SO GLAD I KICKED, SLAPPED, HIT, SLAPPED YOU AGAIN HARDER!

but i am content now.

i wonder how many people have that as their main title.
hmm.
8. 30 - 8. 45 lying down listening to song. sms-ing. went to toilet.
8.45 - 9.00 went out danced to circus using phone. played with doggies.
9.00 - 9.15 did a catwalk along my road. danced. purchased twilight dvd.
9.15 - 9. 30 chased my dogs on heels. fan it and me cos we were so tired.

thats how i spent my earth hour.
the whole time i was sms-ing, rach, may, dniz, za and miya.
sam didnt reply. where'd you go sammy?

i took a pic with sammy. she's wearing make up. and so am i!


and like i had a dance and thank god redzwan took a vid of it. thanks redzwan!

i wanna take a video of our dancing.
why why why.
i am in a dance with el, em, yana, han, sham.
malay song : dia datang.
got chinese, malay, indian moves la.

i wanna wear sleeveless but cannot.
aiya. what rule is that?

i made a word.
:thuper:
say it right or dont say it.
cos its mine.

T - H - U - P - E - R

ill take a pic of me wearing the punjabi thing tomorrow.

and wth seducing pilots?

salad fingers is thuper fckin messed up.

its been six days. wow.

lets see.
last thursday, had no mood to blog. few things happened. but they were trivial.
friday, finally got to stay in kl.
rents went back to kampung.
friday night, slept at d's.
saturday, had seminar robin hood was super annoying and demotivating.
saturday night, slept in the house. super tired.
sunday, had seminar same place again. OH. we met MBS boys. one of them is seriously lazy and i pity his future wife. we also met VI boys. may says one of them is hostile. he's not la. i bet he talks to his friends. i saw him laugh what. and Ampang boys. but they didn't show up on saturday. how sad.
monday morning, my rents came back. and had perhimpunan. and scolded 17-year-old boys to stop talking.
i guess i have to stop being so rude now. i sense hatred amongst form 3s also.
tuesday morning, it rained so no perhimpunan YAY.
got homework. nyaaaa.
today, we danced. tomorrow, raptai.

oh and i think i am putting on weight if i stay up.
oh gawd.
MAY, SRI GARDEN'S TICKET TO IU DAY IS SOLD OUT.
damn sad.
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

i was about to go crazy. and so close to committing suicide.
but i calmed down.
and then she noticed my existence.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

you wanna fucking talk bout my friend. tak yah la nak buat publicly right?
you babi la.
and like the way you talk bout your personal problems is like world war 3 gonna erupt.
and whats with the way you write stuff???
did you get carpal tunnel syndrome?
cos i think you do.
just cos you perform and blah blah yada yada.
doesnt mean you're a fucking rockstar.
you just got lucky.
and dont give us nicknames you fucking slut.
you're the slut.
NOT HER.
gawd, what the fuck is your problem?
i don't want to get into details cos then it would be too obvious who i am talking bout kan?
but still.
calling her something she isn't
is something you are going to be.
but double it and if you dont stop your foolishness, idiocy, stupidity blah blah blah, ill make sure your personal problems will GO PUBLIC.
and you're the type of people who don't deserve to breathe.

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
That scene Never APPEARED!
how could this be?
oh my gawd!!!!

still watching BOF.
not as much as i want to watch the episode as the ones in japanese.
its quite anticipating la.
and korean is a really really really hard language.
i can barely understand what they're saying.
its like japanese+chinese+thailand.

its so hard >.<

doncha think so?

how bout we cut move shake drop from the starting to the end of the chorus.
and from there, we use another song.

like :

damaged - danity kane

when i grow up - PCD

in the ayer - flo rida

cyclone - baby bash

womanizer - britney spears

circus - britney spears

disturbia - rihanna

RIGHT ROUND - flo rida ft keyshia cole *mostly recommended*

pokerface - lady gaga

if you seek amy - britney spears

shawty get loose - lil mama *suggested by may*

bojangles - pitbull

No Daddy - Teairra Mari

DECIDE FAST.

random link - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yRVi0paZlfI&NR=1

i want to.
but its impossible.

anywhoos, pantsless is working so far, its breezy plus its friggin hot ok?

im getting addicted to livita and most probably redbull.

running out of money to spend.

been eating improper meals.

i guess my parents think im independent.
AWESOME.
wish come true.

but they dont trust me going out.

but i still sneak out everywhere.

badass XD

i love love love love 'you found me' and 'dead and gone'

I have homework.
which i seriously don't want to do.

I am such a nerd when i balik kampung.
mainly cos i do my homework until sleeping time.
gawd.

almost missed school today. thanks dniz.

i mean it in a good way lawh!

if only money could fall from the sky.

that'll be SUPER!